[NSFW] The Gruesome History of Sex Toys

Sex toys come in all shapes and sizes and the general rule is that if you can imagine a sex toy, then chances are it already exists. But the origins of some of our kinky favourites may be slightly spookier than you would have expected. Whilst researching the humble beginnings of our sexy favourites, some strange similarities between medieval torture devices and a few of the more extreme toys started appearing…

The Horse was a popular torture device that had its victims sitting on a sharply angled, triangular wooden box, putting all their weight on their crotch. After a session on this nasty contraption the victim would be left unable to walk without pain. Fast forward to now and a less extreme version of The Horse can often be found in BDSM playrooms (ahem Mr Grey), often dubbed the wooden pony. This kinky apparatus is used to balance its victim between pleasure and pain, and on top of that it puts them in the perfect position for spanking.

Stocks were a public humiliation device back in the day, used to punish petty criminals by locking their feet, hands and sometimes their necks in between carved wooden planks. You will probably have seen people locked up in these whilst having rotten tomatoes pelted at them in various Robin Hood remakes. These remind me of the spreader bars. A bit of a stretch maybe, but these contraptions would keep the legs or arms firmly parted and mildly uncomfortable, just like the popular spreader bondage accessories. Hopefully fewer tomatoes are involved these days, but who am I to judge if that’s what you’re into!

Gimp Masks. This one is a bit weird, but did you know that there is this device called the Scold’s Bridle that women who were being accused or witchcraft, bad wives, being rude or even being grumpy had to wear?! These iron masks would have a mouth piece that pressed down on the tongue so the wearer couldn’t talk and it was also common for these women to be put on a leash and paraded around town to humiliate them. So elements of gag play, puppy play, domination play, humiliation play and of course the classic gimp mask can be linked with this bizarre device. However, I doubt the women who had to endure this were getting off on it at the time!

Ok so this next one is really gruesome, but believe it or not, there used to be a device called The Breast Ripper that would act as a pair of giant scissor pincers that – yes, you guessed it – tore women’s boobs off! This one makes me cringe just to imagine it, but you have to admit, if you shrink one of these monsters down, it bears an uncanny resemblance to the more extreme fetish nipple clamps. Again, these clamps are common toys for more extreme fetish play, but in the same way a chicken is related to a dinosaur, it could be possible that the humble nipple clip descended from the horrifying Breast Ripper.

The Rack is one of the more well-known torture devices, but have you ever considered its strange familiarity to bed restraints? Yeah, probably not. This one is a bit of a stretch (yes I realise that was a pun, yes it was intended) but when the victim of the Rack is laid out with their wrists and ankles restrained and their bodies tied down, it does have a faintly kinky air to it.

Ok so this one is another slightly gruesome one. The Heretics Fork was a neck collar with a sharp double ended fork on the front that points between your chin and your collar bone to keep your neck high and your body restrained. The victim would probably get pretty bloody, and that was kind of the point. But it is not un-common for bondage play to include a posture collar to keep the wearers chin high and back straight, the same way the sinister Heretics Fork would.

So finally, to end this morbid list on a particularly gory note, the Spanish Tickler is a prime example of a horrendous device that has been translated into a kinky modern day sex toy. This weapon of sorts looks like a sharp and heavy rake that was slowly dragged down the victim’s bare body, slicing up the skin and flesh, so they would bleed out, but not before enduring severe pain. Cut to the present day and age and we have the Cat’s Paw, a sharp and stimulating claw shaped fork that is made to be dragged along the skin for some innocent sensation play. This toy can also be used to inflict some kinky pain, but nothing close to the original.

Well hopefully you found this as strangely fascinating, if not slightly scary as I did. Perfect for putting you in the mood for some spooky Halloween fun!