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Category Archives: Lifestyle

Sex tips, relationship advice- this section is where you can find lifestyle guidance to improve your sex life!

Clitflix and Thrill

We do not want clever euphemisms or embarrassing confusion hindering your chances of extended evenings of entertaining minge watching. When you suggest Clitflix and Thrill there will be no misinterpreted messages or discarded popcorn, just indulgent, sexual activity on demand. We have spent hours putting together the perfect Clitflix and Thrill toys and though stranger things have happened, we are sure you will stay awake and enthralled until the highly anticipated happy ending.

SKIP INTRO.

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Bondara Pride Rainbow’s End Dildo

With fifty years of Pride upon us and festivities growing bigger and better than ever, we wanted to mark the occasion with something special. This year we have had a dildo stylishly designed in the vividly coloured likeness of Pride’s proud flag. The creation of the irresistible Bondara Pride Rainbow’s End Dildo is in celebration of the LGBTQ community and in support of the LGBT Foundation.

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LELO Lovin’: The Sona

Think back to the most supreme, incomparable clitoral stimulation you have ever experienced. I mean, put down your cappuccino, close your eyes, and visualise that darkened bedroom, that steamy shower session or that unexpected nightclub fumble. Are you there? Well, how good was it? Incredible? Earth-shattering perhaps? Now, imagine it was 75% more pleasurable. Yes, 75% more stimulation than any clitoral orgasm that has previously shuddered between your legs, and all because of the LELO Sona Pink 8 Function Rechargeable Clitoral Stimulator.

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Getting All Dolled Up – Sex Doll Style

In 1959, pop sensation, Cliff Richard sang the iconic words, “I got myself a cryin’, talkin’, sleepin’, walkin’, living doll”. Decades later, we would love to know where Sir Cliff did his shopping, pre-internet, to get such a product? The seventeenth century sex doll origins lie with sexually frustrated Dutch sailors, but the world soon caught on. And now, with the increasing demand for real feel multipurpose dolls coinciding with a freakishly futuristic advance in technology, some of these buxom beauties are so lifelike that they are almost indistinguishable from the real thing.

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The name on everybody’s lips is gonna be…Doxy

A showstopper in its own right, wherever Doxy goes, earth-shattering orgasms follow.

A home-grown British business turned world’s most powerful mains-operated wand massager, Doxy has taken the world – and orgasms – by storm. Since its inception in 2013, Doxy has cemented itself as a leading players in the sex toy industry. With 30% more power than the famous Hitachi, it’s no surprise Doxy is now a multi award-winning brand.

Hailing from sunny Cornwall, the internationally-renowned brand is in a league of its own. Already famed for its trademark pasties, the county proves that whatever it creates, you can bet it’ll be the best you’ve ever had.

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The Rabbit Vibrator

Easter, that time of the year renowned for passion, is the perfect chance to celebrate the world’s favourite rabbit. And no, not that sweet, big eared fucker that comes in the middle of the night delivering chocolate goodness to over-excited fat kids; we mean the sexy, big eared fucker that delivers orgasmic goodness to over-excited adults who come in the middle of the night.

As it is Easter, we could go scrambling around for tenuous links like offering free miraculous returns after three days but instead, what better time to big up Bondara’s best friend. After stealing the title of world’s most recognisable rabbit from the likes of Frank from Donnie Darko and Babs, Bugs Bunny’s awkwardly attractive side kick, the Rabbit Vibrator is now the first rabbit on every woman’s lips.

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Brexit – Fifty Shades of May

So, Theresa May is seeking an extension eh? Well Theresa, aren’t we all? Ironically, although we know exactly where to get one, should she manage to get her extension, we will be the ones stuck looking at a little prick for the next couple of months. As you are aware, we are total advocates for, and openly encourage bondage, discipline, dominance and submission and sadomasochism. But even we feel uneasy as this Prime Minister so publicly indulges in BDSM with the people of Britain. Without so much as a squirt of lubricant May and her Brexit buddies are constantly fucking us from behind with a tiny dick, and although we don’t feel it now, we can eventually expect a huge mess.

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‘Twas the night before Steak and Blowjob Day

‘Twas the night before Steak and Blowjob Day, when all through the house
Your creature was stirring, foreseeing a mouth;
Her stockings were hung up all skimpy to wear,
In hopes that her sweet ass soon would be there;

A billion sperm nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of your plums danced by her head;
And ‘mamma’s’ new hosiery by the eye of your jap,
She must settle down before long in your lap?

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Steak and Blowjob Day – 2019

If you were to troll through my recent search history, (I would strongly advise against this) or examine the questions I have recently asked Google, you would probably come to one of two conclusions; this person is seriously obsessed with sperm and everything semen, or, Steak and Blowjob Day is fast approaching. I suppose, in all reality, you would be right with either answer. I do have an especially odd penchant for this fascinating fluid, but Steak and Blowjob Day, 14th March, comes but once a year and it has me extremely giddy.

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Just Whip It Out – Your Weirdest Place?

The Newlywed Game Show Host, Bob Eubanks –

Tell me, where specifically is the weirdest place, that you personally girls, have ever gotten the urge to make whoopee?”

Olga –

“In the ass”

Hang on, wait, what? Does anyone have this Olga girl’s number??

When someone accidentally infers that they have a hankering for anal sex on national television because she misunderstood the question, it makes you wonder what she would have said had she been on the same wavelength as the host. “Oh, the weirdest place, as in Location, Bob?” I like to think that perhaps she fantasised about a leather-clad threesome at the local rodeo? Maybe a full-on fuck fest in the cereal aisle at Tesco? Heck, riding through town on the back of a tractor-trailer, sucking on a dildo, throwing lollipops to the locals? Olga?

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