Unwrap the gift of pleasure this Christmas. Santa’s little helpers have been very busy and put together a naughty nice list full of festive faves. There’s a mix of expensive indulgences and ‘cozzie livs’ friendly options for under your tree.
Rear-deer Games
Christmas is a time for fun and games, but the question is, what kind are you going to bring? Perhaps it’s time to put away the puzzles and crack out the adult games instead. Not just to be enjoyed by couples wanting spice, naughty twists on classic faves like Filthy Snap and Fondle (adult Twister) are perfect for sharing with like-minded friends.
Of course, you can always up the ante if it’s just you and your partner. A cheeky butt plug like the Full House worn for a forfeit during a cosy card game would add a little spice to the season, or lean into the winter chill by popping your metal butt plug in the fridge!
Candy Canes and Backdoor Lanes Aglow
Everyone likes a proper stocking stuffer, so get your fill of our limited-edition Christmas toys while you can. The Christmas Candy Cane is a perennial bestseller, but once they’re gone, they’re gone… If you miss out, we still have plenty of glass toys that are smooth and sleek, just like an icicle.
If you prefer your pleasure to be made of silicone, you can also opt for an anal dildo that wouldn’t look out of place in a Christmas display. Soft and sparkly, the Over The Rainbow looks just a tower of gumdrops and the wide triangular suction base means you won’t be making any embarrassing A&E trips.
Baby It’s Cold Outside (So Let’s Stay In Bed)
Send the kids to bed early, or maybe you’re not getting woken up at the arse crack of dawn; we want you to cum before Christmas does! There are many Christmas gifts for couples that could get you ‘there’, but my favourite is couples vibrators.
Slim enough to be worn during sex, used for foreplay, or worn during a boring dinner like a love egg, they give you plenty of bang for your buck. We-Vibe is the ‘GOAT’, as the youths say, when it comes to these sex toys for couples, and my Sync O never stays in its box long. However, if you’re after a more affordable option, go for our Smitten – it’s just as skinny and comes with a remote for distance play.
The Prettiest Sight to See
Did you know that in Iceland, it’s a tradition to get new clothes for Christmas Eve? If they don’t, they get eaten by a monster. Now, we don’t believe in that kind of thing, but we do want you to be eaten… eaten out! Dressed up in Christmas lingerie, all pretty in the Sleigh Me with red lace and white faux fur just like Santa, your lover won’t be able to ho-ho-hold back.
Hang a Bondara Bauble from your tree to gift someone a secret crotchless G-string. The elegant white lace suits any season, making this little lingerie surprise the gift that gives all year long.
On The First Day of Kiss-mas…
364 gifts is a bit much (espeically of that many birds) but you still want to find a luxury gift with your name tag on it. We love a vibrator but lets admit it, buzzes are basic. If you want a premium experience then clitoral suction vibrators are the way to go. The Womanizer Next takes things to the next level with the all-new ‘3D Pleasure Air Technology™’ to surround clits and nips with deeper, thrumming suction.
Now for something completely different (and at a lower price point), the Airhead combines a gentle suckling motion with a delicate flicking tongue to replicate oral sex sensations.
Here Cums Santa Claus!
Leave out a tasty treat for Father Christmas after all the toys he’s about to leave under your tree.
Boobie biscuits pair best with milk (or should that be breast), plus they’re all butter shortbread! Perfect for dunking, they also come in dick-shaped for a his and hers stocking filler, or tongue-in-cheek secret Santa.
Can’t decide? Browse all of our Christmas Gifts for seasonal-themed sauciness. Plus, there’s still time to grab an advent calendar in time for the big day — who cares if you’re a couple of days late when you could unwrap them all at once?
