Paris, the city of lights… of love… and home to the 2024 Olympic Games. Time to get in the spirit and set your own personal best with toys that come second so you can cum first.
The Olympics, an international competition of athletic prowess, stamina and endurance. While the athletes are busy sprinting and swimming, we can only imagine the different kinds of competitions happening back in the Olympic village.
Let’s be honest, with all those fit, adrenaline-fueled bodies, once the games are over it must be one giant hotbed of hormonal antics. Apparently Olympian sex lives have been a big deal at past Summer Olympics.
“Sex is always an issue in the [Olympic] village… The athletes are at their physical peak. When the competition is over, they want to release their energy”
Former Olympian long jumper Susen Tiedtke
So, we’ve selected a couple of standout newcomers that could win a gold medal in an entirely different kind of competition…
Balance Beam Bliss
Show the judges just how you can move and strike a pose that’ll leave you breathless.
The first step of building a buzzing Olympic dream team, the Poser rivals the best floor routine when it comes to balancing stimulation and style. This poseable rabbit can get into position and hold it so you can focus on going for gold.
Erotic Equestrians
Give a commanding performance in the dressage with a chic riding crop, ready to whip up the competition.
With a handle that glitters with diamante crystals, the Bondara Luxe Glamour Riding Crop pairs form with function so you’ll feel the thrill of victory with every swish.
Plus if you’re missing a mount, slip a ponytail hood on your sub to make them the prettiest pony in show.
Going home with more than just medals, condoms have been regularly handed out at the Olympics since the AIDs crisis. This year Paris is supplying the games with 300,000 condoms!
Soaring Ass-letics
Reach new heights of anal ecstasy and prove you can clear the bar in the pole vault.
It takes training to handle the B-Ass-Illisk Monster, but once you take the plunge it’ll unlock an exhilarating experience as you explore your depths. Lined with scaly texture, this 24.5 inch Monster is worthy of champions.
Butterfly Stroke Sensations
Get yourself into freestyle frenzy and share a couples vibrator with your teammate.
Featuring the fluttering stimulation of a butterfly vibrator, the Butterfly Stroke elegantly combines strength with speed to unleash waves of satisfaction.
Plus, between being remote controlled and held in place by the wearer’s body, your hands are free for a breaststroke.
The Tokyo Olympics in 2020 introduced cardboard beds, allegedly as environmentally friendly furniture but they soon raised eyebrows when people questioned whether you’d be able to have sex on one.
Parrying Passion in the Fencing
Thrust, riposte, allez! Disarm your partner with pleasure, the Slamalot is a double ended dildo that strikes home in every bout.
Perfect for kinky foilplay, this seductive sabre from our Monsters collection features all manner of textures. It’s the ultimate match between you and your desires!
En garde!
During the 2012 games in London, Grindr, the gay dating app, CRASHED due to high usage volume once the teams landed. Either they were looking for fellow athletes or out to sample the local talent…
The Climax of the Games…
You’ve got the gear, now get out there and add a few more notches to your Nikes (or bedposts).
Check out more Olympic hopefuls in our What’s New page for even more victory lap playmates.
Leave your sporty sex stories in the comments below, and share how you’ll be celebrating Team GB Gold. 🥇🇬🇧
