{"id":31325,"date":"2024-05-21T14:58:38","date_gmt":"2024-05-21T13:58:38","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.bondara.co.uk\/blog\/?p=31325"},"modified":"2024-05-22T10:56:39","modified_gmt":"2024-05-22T09:56:39","slug":"confessions-of-a-wanker-part-fourplay","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.bondara.co.uk\/blog\/funny\/confessions-of-a-wanker-part-fourplay\/","title":{"rendered":"Confessions of a Wanker: Part Four(play)"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It&#8217;s that time of year again. We&#8217;ve asked our customers to submit their best, horny masturbation confessions for everyone&#8217;s enjoyment. Don&#8217;t worry, they&#8217;re completely anonymous! Read on to hear what you weird wankers have been up to&#8230;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><sup>Long Distance Lovers<\/sup><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-columns is-layout-flex wp-container-core-columns-is-layout-8f761849 wp-block-columns-is-layout-flex\">\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\" style=\"flex-basis:33.33%\"><div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter size-large\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.bondara.co.uk\/sex-toys\/vibrators\/app-controlled-vibrators?utm_source=blog&amp;utm_medium=article&amp;utm_campaign=confessions_of_a_wanker_part_four\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bondara.co.uk\/media\/products\/c66d3d45-6881-4b91-8554-00359a60c39c\/7754d45b-e7f9-4468-91a0-d21328f80087\/c\/cy41-large.jpg?w=800&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"Bondara Sex Toy Blog - Confessions of a Wanker: Part Four(Play) - Bondara Divine 12 Function App Controlled Vibrating Love Egg\"\/><\/a><figcaption class=\"wp-element-caption\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.bondara.co.uk\/sex-toys\/vibrators\/app-controlled-vibrators?utm_source=blog&amp;utm_medium=article&amp;utm_campaign=confessions_of_a_wanker_part_four\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">App Controlled Vibrators<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\" style=\"flex-basis:66.66%\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">&#8220;When a boyfriend and I were long-distance, I used to ask him to send me the porn he liked to watch. I liked to see what he was getting off to because I found it a turn-on to know what he was watching. I wanted us to get involved with <a href=\"https:\/\/beducated.com\/?utm_source=blog&amp;utm_medium=article&amp;utm_campaign=confessions_of_a_wanker_part_four\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Beducated<\/a>, too, when I returned to the country. However, the relationship didn&#8217;t last. &#x1f602; I&#8217;d take a similar approach with future partners, though, if they were up for it.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-small-font-size wp-block-paragraph\"><em>Sharing is caring. This includes porn search histories &#x1f351;&#x1f346;<\/em><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-columns is-layout-flex wp-container-core-columns-is-layout-8f761849 wp-block-columns-is-layout-flex\">\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\" style=\"flex-basis:66.66%\">\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><sup>Keep the Noise Down!<\/sup><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">&#8220;This is major embarrassing! I was home from uni and thought I had the house to myself. So, I put on some porn and got my 11-inch friend out for some fun. I was close to finishing and had not been quiet when there was a knock on the door&#8230; My mum was telling me to keep the noise down. I nearly died!&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-small-font-size wp-block-paragraph\"><em>Always check that you&#8217;re <strong>actually <\/strong>alone before getting freaky. <\/em><\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\" style=\"flex-basis:33.33%\"><div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter size-large is-resized\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.bondara.co.uk\/sex-toys\/dildos\/big-large-dildos?utm_source=blog&amp;utm_medium=article&amp;utm_campaign=confessions_of_a_wanker_part_four\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bondara.co.uk\/media\/products\/e4b96a18-040a-4dc6-9bd1-b12ae948e89d\/de72361f-dad7-4e7f-84b8-a7b939a300fb\/c\/bj26-large.jpg?w=800&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"Bondara Sex Toy Blog - Confessions of a Wanker: Part Four(Play) - Bondara Dazzling Purple Suction Cup Dildo - 10 Inch\" style=\"width:277px;height:auto\"\/><\/a><figcaption class=\"wp-element-caption\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.bondara.co.uk\/sex-toys\/dildos\/big-large-dildos?utm_source=blog&amp;utm_medium=article&amp;utm_campaign=confessions_of_a_wanker_part_four\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Huge Dildos<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/div><\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><sup>Fap-cidents Happen!<\/sup><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-columns is-layout-flex wp-container-core-columns-is-layout-8f761849 wp-block-columns-is-layout-flex\">\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\" style=\"flex-basis:33.33%\">\t<div class=\"wp-block-jetpack-gif aligncenter\">\n\t\t<figure>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"wp-block-jetpack-gif-wrapper\" style=\"padding-top:56%\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<iframe src=\"https:\/\/giphy.com\/embed\/r1HGFou3mUwMw\" title=\"https:\/\/giphy.com\/gifs\/noisygifs-daaayummm-r1HGFou3mUwMw\"><\/iframe>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/figure>\n\t<\/div>\n\t<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\" style=\"flex-basis:66.66%\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">&#8220;I don&#8217;t know how it happened&#8230; but somehow cut my clit on my vibrator.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-small-font-size wp-block-paragraph\"><em>This is why you don&#8217;t buy cheap toys<\/em>!<em> Buy quality from Bondara <\/em>&#x1f60f;<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><sup>Down Where It\u2019s Wetter<\/sup><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-columns is-layout-flex wp-container-core-columns-is-layout-8f761849 wp-block-columns-is-layout-flex\">\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\" style=\"flex-basis:66.66%\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">&#8220;I love the idea of masturbating on camera, squirting and being forced to lick it up from the floor.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-small-font-size wp-block-paragraph\"><em>I&#8217;m not sure this is what a thirst tweet means&#8230; &#x1f4a6;<\/em><\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\" style=\"flex-basis:33.33%\"><div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter size-large\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.bondara.co.uk\/bondara-colonel-climax-black-sex-machine-with-dildo-6-inch?utm_source=blog&amp;utm_medium=article&amp;utm_campaign=confessions_of_a_wanker_part_four\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bondara.co.uk\/media\/products\/d8c1a1e1-e560-4264-8c8d-99a4882113a5\/7b394a6f-f853-490d-9b00-c59ab3fb48fb\/c\/cq95-large.jpg?w=800&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"Bondara Sex Toy Blog - Confessions of a Wanker: Part Four(Play) - Bondara Colonel Climax Black Sex Machine with Dildo - 5.7 Inch\"\/><\/a><figcaption class=\"wp-element-caption\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.bondara.co.uk\/bondara-colonel-climax-black-sex-machine-with-dildo-6-inch?utm_source=blog&amp;utm_medium=article&amp;utm_campaign=confessions_of_a_wanker_part_four\">Sex Machines<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/div><\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><sup>Is Anybody in There?<\/sup><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">&#8220;I almost lost my favourite dildo inside myself&#8230;&#8221; <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-small-font-size wp-block-paragraph\"><em>Say it with me, people&#8230; If it doesn&#8217;t have a flared base, it shouldn&#8217;t go inside you!<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><sup>Get Down with the Sickness<\/sup><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-columns is-layout-flex wp-container-core-columns-is-layout-8f761849 wp-block-columns-is-layout-flex\">\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\" style=\"flex-basis:33.33%\"><div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter size-large\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.bondara.co.uk\/sex-toys\/love-eggs?utm_source=blog&amp;utm_medium=article&amp;utm_campaign=confessions_of_a_wanker_part_four\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bondara.co.uk\/media\/products\/2a1f82b7-923c-40e3-aeeb-f1fcdca27f4b\/7d1c9fa7-e2f7-4265-8bcf-b0b7ade980b2\/c\/do12-large.jpg?w=800&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"Bondara Sex Toy Blog - Confessions of a Wanker: Part Four(Play) - Bondara Rocker Aqua 10 Function Rotating Remote Control Love Egg\"\/><\/a><figcaption class=\"wp-element-caption\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.bondara.co.uk\/sex-toys\/love-eggs?utm_source=blog&amp;utm_medium=article&amp;utm_campaign=confessions_of_a_wanker_part_four\">Love Eggs &amp; Ben Wa Balls<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\" style=\"flex-basis:66.66%\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">&#8220;I had to pretend to be sick and stay in my room &#8217;cause I had a sex toy inside me. My roommate came home early&#8230; I don&#8217;t think she bought it!&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-small-font-size wp-block-paragraph\"><em>Those were moans of pain&#8230; because you were sick, right? &#x1f609;<\/em><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><sup>Under Pressure<\/sup><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-columns is-layout-flex wp-container-core-columns-is-layout-8f761849 wp-block-columns-is-layout-flex\">\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\" style=\"flex-basis:66.66%\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">&#8220;I used to wank with a 2L bottle of Fanta.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-small-font-size wp-block-paragraph\"><em>I&#8217;d like to this this was a mid-wank refreshment, but something tells me it wasn&#8217;t &#x1f440;<\/em><\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\" style=\"flex-basis:33.33%\">\t<div class=\"wp-block-jetpack-gif aligncenter\">\n\t\t<figure>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"wp-block-jetpack-gif-wrapper\" style=\"padding-top:100%\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<iframe src=\"https:\/\/giphy.com\/embed\/pzU9ygGgWnBHPebcoY\" title=\"https:\/\/giphy.com\/gifs\/up-yours-contempt-fizzy-drink-pzU9ygGgWnBHPebcoY\"><\/iframe>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/figure>\n\t<\/div>\n\t<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><sup>Does Size Matter? <\/sup><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-columns is-layout-flex wp-container-core-columns-is-layout-8f761849 wp-block-columns-is-layout-flex\">\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\" style=\"flex-basis:33.33%\">\t<div class=\"wp-block-jetpack-gif aligncenter\">\n\t\t<figure>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"wp-block-jetpack-gif-wrapper\" style=\"padding-top:56%\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<iframe src=\"https:\/\/giphy.com\/embed\/dxCQGEz7RRUr3PCP0T\" title=\"https:\/\/giphy.com\/gifs\/108-tallboyz-burn-unit-dxCQGEz7RRUr3PCP0T\"><\/iframe>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/figure>\n\t<\/div>\n\t<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\" style=\"flex-basis:66.66%\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">&#8220;Got caught by my ex&#8217;s mum as I was blowing my load in the bathroom. Later on, I overheard her and my ex-girlfriend talking about my size.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-small-font-size wp-block-paragraph\"><em>What&#8217;s that saying about a man&#8217;s 12 inches? <\/em><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><sup>Turn Around<\/sup><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">&#8220;I have to turn all the framed photos of my family around. It feels weird to see them when I&#8217;m jerking off&#8230; almost like they&#8217;re watching me!&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-small-font-size wp-block-paragraph\"><em>I always feel like somebody&#8217;s watchin&#8217; me&#8230; And I have no privacy<\/em> &#x1f3b6;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><sup>A Reminder for Everyone<\/sup><\/span><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-columns is-layout-flex wp-container-core-columns-is-layout-8f761849 wp-block-columns-is-layout-flex\">\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\">\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">&#8220;I was having a cheeky wank, and it was amazing! But, right as I had almost cum&#8230; My toy died just before I hit the big O.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-small-font-size wp-block-paragraph\"><em>It&#8217;s happened to all of us at some point&#8230; Never forget to charge your vibrator! &#x1f622;<\/em><\/p>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-column is-layout-flow wp-block-column-is-layout-flow\">\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"800\" height=\"534\" data-attachment-id=\"31414\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.bondara.co.uk\/blog\/funny\/confessions-of-a-wanker-part-fourplay\/attachment\/billboards-_01\/\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bondara.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/05\/Billboards-_01-scaled.jpg?fit=2560%2C1707&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"2560,1707\" data-comments-opened=\"0\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;0&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"Billboards-_01\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bondara.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/05\/Billboards-_01-scaled.jpg?fit=800%2C534&amp;ssl=1\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bondara.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/05\/Billboards-_01.jpg?resize=800%2C534&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-31414\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bondara.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/05\/Billboards-_01-scaled.jpg?resize=1024%2C683&amp;ssl=1 1024w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bondara.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/05\/Billboards-_01-scaled.jpg?resize=500%2C333&amp;ssl=1 500w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bondara.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/05\/Billboards-_01-scaled.jpg?resize=1536%2C1024&amp;ssl=1 1536w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bondara.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/05\/Billboards-_01-scaled.jpg?resize=2048%2C1365&amp;ssl=1 2048w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bondara.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/05\/Billboards-_01-scaled.jpg?w=1600&amp;ssl=1 1600w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.bondara.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/05\/Billboards-_01-scaled.jpg?w=2400&amp;ssl=1 2400w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 800px) 100vw, 800px\" \/><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-dots\"\/>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Now you&#8217;ve read the best masturbation confessions of this year, why don&#8217;t you submit some more below? &#x1f632; Or read our previous instalments in the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.bondara.co.uk\/blog\/tag\/sex-confessions\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">sex confessions<\/a> tag! Check out our <a href=\"https:\/\/x.com\/Bondara?utm_source=blog&amp;utm_medium=article&amp;utm_campaign=confessions_of_a_wanker_part_four\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Twitter<\/a> and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/bondara\/?utm_source=blog&amp;utm_medium=article&amp;utm_campaign=confessions_of_a_wanker_part_four\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">Instagram<\/a> for more saucy stories and sex tips. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity\"\/>\n\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-embed is-type-rich is-provider-spotify wp-block-embed-spotify wp-embed-aspect-21-9 wp-has-aspect-ratio\"><div class=\"wp-block-embed__wrapper\">\n<iframe title=\"Spotify Embed: Inappropriate Thoughts\" style=\"border-radius: 12px\" width=\"100%\" height=\"152\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen allow=\"autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; fullscreen; picture-in-picture\" loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/embed\/show\/3R5KAGv4rtJAaVioG7okDi?utm_source=oembed\"><\/iframe>\n<\/div><\/figure>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity\"\/>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-post-author\"><div class=\"wp-block-post-author__avatar\"><img alt='' src='https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/f47ad76ee8f7bc1b777f1c3b4ada0cfa6a444f590d07b0b5769deec0b448a0fb?s=48&#038;d=mm&#038;r=g' srcset='https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/f47ad76ee8f7bc1b777f1c3b4ada0cfa6a444f590d07b0b5769deec0b448a0fb?s=96&#038;d=mm&#038;r=g 2x' class='avatar avatar-48 photo' height='48' width='48' \/><\/div><div class=\"wp-block-post-author__content\"><p class=\"wp-block-post-author__name\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.bondara.co.uk\/blog\/author\/larrisap\/\" target=\"_self\">Larissa Patience<\/a><\/p><\/div><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>It&#8217;s that time of year again. We&#8217;ve asked our customers to submit their best, horny masturbation confessions for everyone&#8217;s enjoyment. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":22,"featured_media":31405,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[2260],"tags":[1718,353,4646,4780],"class_list":["post-31325","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-funny","tag-humour","tag-masturbation","tag-masturbation-month","tag-sex-confessions"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.8 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Confessions of a Wanker: Part Four(play) - Bondara Sex Toys Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"It&#039;s that time of year again. 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