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Fetish Facts

This week I thought I’d create a glossary of terms that are commonly used within the BDSM/kink/fetish community so that you can better understand this sexual playground. Enjoy!

 

A

Anal torture – pain inflicted upon the anus, often with sex toys.

 

B

BDSM – Bondage/Discipline, Dominance/Submission, Sadism/Masochism – a term used to describe anything within the kink scene.

Bondage – The practice of physically restraining a person, often done with rope.

Bottom – I person on the receiving end of sex or domination – opposite to Top.

Breast Bondage – Bondage specific to the breasts. Breast restraint will either flatten breasts of cause them to protrude. Breasts will often become red and more sensitive.

 

C

Chastity – A form of sexual denial whereby a person is unable to touch or stimulate their genitalia. Sometimes a devices is worn to prevent touching; a chastity belt for a woman and a cock cage for a man. A device may feature a lock to which the Dom(me) holds the key.

Cock and Ball Torture (CBT) – Torture of the penis and testicles for masochistic sexual gratification.

Collared – A person (slave/submissive) who is owned by a Dom(me)/Master. Sometimes the two will be in a loving, committed relationship. Alternatively a Dom(me) may have more than one collared ‘pup’.

Contract – A formal, written agreement drawn up between a Dominant and a submissive. Such a document will set out all boundaries and limitations with regard to sexual and non sexual behaviour between the two.

 

woman on lead subD

Dom/Dominant – The person in control (with this spelling, usually male) – opposite to submissive.

Domme/Dominatrix – The person in control (female) – opposite to submissive.

D/s – Dominance/submission – Erotic play whereby one party has control over the other.

Dungeon – A room in which BDSM play takes place. Such a room may feature bondage equipment.

 

E

Edgeplay – BDSM play which holds a higher risk of causing physical or emotional harm than regular BDSM play. High risk activities include (but are not limited to) knife play, breath play, erotic beating and fire play.

 

F

Fetish – Sexual gratification being linked to an excessive extent to a particular object or part of the body.

 

G

Genitorture – Torture of the genitalia

 

tied up lady on bed shibariH

Hard Limits – Non-negotiable limits set by a person in relation to how far they’re willing to go sexually and/or how much pain they’re willing to endure.

Hogtie – A bondage position whereby the subject is lying on their stomach and their hands and feet are restrained together behind their back.

 

K

Kinbaku (Shibari) – A Japanese style of rope bondage which is both intricate and visually pleasing.

 

L

Limits – Something a person is unwilling to do.

 

M

Masochism – Experiencing sexual gratification as a result of pain (receiving). A “masochist” is a person who enjoys receiving pain.

Master/slave – A relationship in which one person (Master) exercises complete control over the other (slave). This can be for a short period or any amount of time up to a 247 live-in Dom/sub relationship.

 

P

Pegging – The sexual practice of a woman anally penetrating a man with a strap-on dildo.

ProDom(me) – A professional Dominant. (Dominates paying customers).

 

R

RACK – Risk Awareness Consensual Kink.

 

domme snow whiteS

Sadism – The act of inflicting pain. A “sadist” is a person who enjoys inflicting pain on another person. In a sexual/BDSM context a person experiences sexual gratification when inflicting pain on another person.

SSC – Safe, Sane and Consensual – A safety protocol sometimes adhered to by persons practicing BDSM.

Sensation Play – A form of BDSM or sexual play that focuses on the five senses. For example, temperature play focuses on a person’s sense of touch. Sensation play can also involve depriving a person of one or more of their senses, such as by blindfolding them.

Slave – A submissive, controlled by a Master.

Soft Limits – Something which a person is hesitant to try but not something which they rule out completely.

Submissive/sub – A person who gives up control to a Dominant.

Switch – Someone who enjoys being both Top and bottom/ Dom(me) and sub, depending on their mood and the situation.

 

T

Top – A person on the giving end of sex or domination – opposite to bottom.

Training – A practice whereby a Dominant teaches a submissive how to act and behave.

 

V

Vanilla – Any sexual activity that is unrelated to BDSM/ a person who is not into BDSM.

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